I was trying to be faithful tomy commitments, and to myself, and that also disturbed me, that I couldbe so close to giving in. Even more disturbing wa... the lack of a clearnotion of who I was anymore.I left for home, changed back to John, and invited my mom over fordinner. My mom, Linda, and I went out to Applebee?s for dinner. I toldher all about what had been happening. Her only comment was I needed totell my brother SOON. He had been worried that I wasn?t home, and hadbeen bugging her for. When I got home I scanned the parking lot for my roommates car. It was nowhere to be seen so that meant that he had already left for Houston . I grabbed my stuff and ran up the stairs. I was so nervous with anticipation I could barely get the key in the door. I got in and locked the door with the deadbolt and the chain. I went to my room and stripped to my boxers. I took all my new clothes and took the tags off and neatly laid them out on the bed. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a beer,. More

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