It is not that the need is not there, but the stage fright is great than the need to relieve yourself. You feel a little panic boil in your tummy, and...you strain, and push, try to force it. You grunt into the gag and push causing one long anguished sound to come from you as you try to force the urine to flow, I can't fail. The very idea of it panics you. Finally, you feel it; you hold your breath and concentrate. As I stand over you holding your hair, only the sound of my breath, and cars. It’s a brand new beginning for you.” He said that as he turned the monitor to me.On the monitor, I was in a hospital bed hooked to all kinds of shit. I heard the doctor tell them that there was no hope. I had a massive stroke after my trike had been hit by a teenager one her way to school. I had been on my way home from a morning work out ride. Yes Mikah was also killed by the collision. I was grateful for that, even though I shouldn’t have been. I don’t know how I knew that, I just did.“Doctor. More

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