It was the self-portrait my friend Evelyn painted of herself after her third and last suicide attempt. When it had happened, my mom was afraid that me...and my friends had formed some sort of suicide pact because of something she saw on Oprah or something. I had thought of death a lot during high school, but looking back on the first two years, they were rough, but the last two years were worth it despite the fact that I had distanced myself from the people who had taken me in as one of their. This "personaseepage," as I had come to think of it, had seemingly begun theevening Jennifer imposed a second set of posthypnotic commandsupon me. I was now compelled to wear feminine undergarments and alight coating of makeup at all times, whether dressed and actingas Daniel or Dani. I was now reluctant to wear female clothingwhen the Daniel persona was in charge-- for fear the "seepage"would increase. Jennifer, of course, had the solution to myreluctance. "Don't you want to be PRETTY, SISSY. More

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