“Not to be a dick,” I said, “But what do I have to do for this kite?”“I’m gonna need you to get me off,” he said, “Twice.”“Excuse ...e?” I replied.“What I really want is to fuck that ass of yours,” he clarified, “But I’ll accept a good blow job.”“You know I'm not gay right?”“It’s not about that,” he said, “I’m not gay either. But I have been locked up for seven years with five more to go. Masturbation gets old.”“You’ll have to let me think about this,” I said after a long pause. The problem was. I offered them champagne, but she reached for my hanging balls as she leaned in to give me a peek on the cheek and whispered in my ear.“I had the pleasure of seeing your whore-wife” she whispered pleasantly. “and when I say pleasure….” As she tightly squeezed my balls. She then released her grip, leaned back and smiled.“As did I” said the gentleman standing beside her. They both smiled. Then the doorbell rang, and I was back to my duties. More and more guests arrived and soon there were about. More

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