Then I fired up the computer to compose the letter I had in mind. It took a while to find where Word was located since I normally only used the comput...r to surf the web for porn. Eventually, I had a very professional letter printed. As I read it over, I knew Caroline would never doubt its authenticity. It even looked real to me, and I wrote the damn thing!My plan was simple. The letter informed Caroline that she had won a promotion from a local restaurant we frequent. The prize was six tickets. When she came back in she was crying. “Dad,” she said, “mom wants to know how long it would take for you to move out of her house.”He was surprised and said, “What?”“First,” she said, “mom won’t talk to you, not now, not ever. She said it was her house, she was paying for it, and she wants you to leave. When I asked her where you should go she said you should go to hell. Dad,” Dorothy added, “you must have really done something bad.”Ignoring Dorothy’s accusation he asked instead, “She won’t. More

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