I feel even lower than before. I feel likesuch a small and pitiful person. Is that what I am now? No, my heart wasin the right place, I was just blin...ed by fear. I was scared that Dougwas going to be just like my Dad. He was a great person until he left us.Or he was going to be like some many other men, like John, or Carl. Myfear made the sins of other men be laid upon my husband by me. I neverhad a good relationship with a man other than Doug, and a few other men.I do not even get along with. " it was no use hiding the marks now, not that I wanted too as I hate hiding and lying, I needed them both to understand. I stood for him to gaze, my bruised tits and striped belly shiny from the cream and him staring at my marks, mouth open. To break the moment I asked, rather matter of factly, "Could you do me a favour, and rub some of this on my back as it`s difficult to reach?" I asked offering him the tube of cream, “a um, well… yeah, sure." I laid on the bed, face down, legs slightly. More

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