Is it inborn—inevitable all along, perhaps? Or is it the result of some sort of psychic compensation rooted in childhood and originating in my mothe...’s abdication of her role as my father’s source of pleasure and nurture? Did I, like certain simple-celled animals whose sex is determined by necessity, by this or that chemical in the water, adapt my gender potentiality to suit the need of an unbalanced home whose female energy was wanting? Most likely it’s a little of both. Whatever. I liked how i looked and the clothes felt I had started doing it at about 13 going to the schools gymnasium storage room and taking pairs of girls spandex shorts from the volleyball uniforms, I would be on sports trips for school and always volinteer to load bags on the school bus before we would leave, The team bags had each girls name on them and all the older hotter girls dressed like sluts on sports trips and its pretty easy to take clothes and slip them into your bag. By the time i was 16. More

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