It was total romance. She never topped that one. I would get the best results with her sticking my tongue up into her bung pie as far as I could and m...ssage her rump while tossing her salad. Sometimes it would happen right away but sometimes it could take 20 minutes before it would come poot pooting out. The romance saved my marriage. You do the math. I figure that 3 farts per week over a year works out to about 156 farts. So in 20 years, I've inhaled over 3100 farts.”Marcus cleared his throat. Behind us, the sun rose merrily in the eastern sky, oblivious to our anguished hearts. As I embraced her, tasting the bitter sweetness of her tears, I felt her fingertips desperately clutching mine—first to her brow, then her bosom, her left shoulder then her right. She shuddered, and a fresh torrent of sobs broke over her like a wave in the ocean she was forming on my shoulder. ‘Frank? Will you lead us in prayer?’ My mother’s sparkling, cornflower-blue eyes fixed on my face. I could. More

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