✧ ✧ ✧Don’t bother walking a mile in my shoes that would be boring. Spend 30 seconds in my head, that’ll freak you right out.✧ ✧ ✧I rem...mber being able to get up without sound effects... Good times!✧ ✧ ✧My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb.✧ ✧ ✧When I ask for directions, please don’t use words like ‘East’✧ ✧ ✧The older I get the earlier it gets late.✧ ✧ ✧If you answer the phone with “Hello, you’re on the air!” most telemarketers will quickly hang up... ✧ ✧ ✧That moment when you walk. As they say though, looks can be deceiving. Anyway, I usually start my day off by reading the classified ads in the paper. I do this to find my next victim. A victim of my perversions even more helpless than a child. I wonder what Ill find today. As I scan the paper, I find three suitable matches that could get me a victim tonight. A family has a baby and no longer wants their 2 year old lab. Labs are boring though, and I just slaughtered one last night. Another guy has a pit bull thats too. More

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