’You must now refer to them as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS. And furthermore,HOW TO SPEAK ABOUTWOMENAND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:1. She is not a ‘BABE’ o... a ‘CHICK’ - She is aBREASTED AMERICAN. ‘2. She is not ‘EASY’ - She is ‘HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.’3. She is not a ‘DUMB BLONDE’ - She is a ‘LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.’4. She has not ‘BEEN AROUND’ - She is a ‘PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.’5. She does not ‘NAG’ you - She becomes ‘VERBALLY REPETITIVE.’6. She is not a ‘TWO-BIT. Iwas so alive when Jake kissed me, but I knew we were ultimately doomed.My emotional high was now crashing and the adrenaline was now fading. Iwas now quickly becoming much more subdued and considerably lessoutgoing. I became stunted in my conversation and let Jake do most of thetalking for us. I periodically looked into his eyes and smiled, but Itried not to get too emotional with him. I was fighting my internaldesire to be Jake's girl.When the meal and the speeches ended the Bride and Groom. More

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