The pain is masked by the pleasurable effects of the gel and strangely, instead of debilitating me, it allows me a moment of clarity as the opposing f...rces clash and neutralise each other. Reason hits me like a truck. I’m killing my baby. By choosing not to eat, I am going against my word to keep him safe from harm. In my desperation to be free, I chose my life over his, no matter how unintentionally. I didn’t think about the consequences of my starvation. Once again, I have forgotten about. Cari just wouldn't understand. Not Cari, ever-ready and ever-willing Cari.Memories flooded his mind, taking him back to that night five years ago. It was two months after their parents had been killed in a car accident. He had come home to visit Uncle Bill and Aunt Emma, and Cari who was living with them. His uncle and aunt had gone to a movie and left him and his sister alone.He had gone to his room early, telling Cari he had to study, he remembered, when in fact he wanted to read a rather. More

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