He sits quietly for a moment. I could offer the first word, but I know what my goal is here and part of it is letting him fuck with me a bit. Finally,...he says, ‘I fired you for a reason, Jacob. You’re not welcome here.’ Time to kiss some ass. ‘I know that what I did was inappropriate for an engineer,’ I say, ‘and I will add as many adjectives on to my apology as you want me to. I will. But if you’ll agree to book the Teddy Fields project then I won’t be here as an engineer and I won’t be. Anger was anacceptable emotion. But on the other hand, it was also an emotion that Iwas tired of constantly feeling. Unfortunately the only alternativesseemed to be fear or loneliness, and those were even worse."What the hell am I going to do?" I muttered bitterly.I sat on the edge of my bed and closed my eyes, only to see images of myearlier encounter with Gary. All those other kids had stared at me withlooks of fear and contempt. I was used to those kind of looks, but Istill didn't like. More

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