Mark was a Londoner and unused to small towns where everyone knew each other. He somehow let slip that he was here to meet a lady called Claire.“Oh,...you mean the Major?” replied Dee.“Sorry,” Mark replied.“The Major, everyone knows her as the Major. Major Claire Hicks, she’s in the army.”Mark visibly gulped on his pint. “No, I had no idea, I thought she was a civil servant,” Mark replied.“Well, I guess that is sort of right.” Dee moved off to serve another customer.Mark was surprised, they had. My arm pits are smelly. I stink between my hips, like fish at the front, and faeces at the back. I have no friends. Nobody likes me. Everyone thinks Im a smelly loser. I get bullied and mocked by the bitchy popular valley-girls, they gossip and giggle about me, about how I stink, about my lame clothes, about how much of a dweeb and a loser I am, and when they see me in the hall they chant Smelly-boy, smelly-boy, Jonothons a smelly-boy! over and over and over. I still try to suck up to them cos. More

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