I just danced with her, trying to ignore the lyrics of the song. Some soulful balladeer was going on and on about how things would have been much bett...r if they'd only tried a little harder, and not given up so soon."Because you're worth it to me. You're all I'll ever need. We can hold on for forever, if you just try to believe..." etc. etc.Shut up, asshole, I thought to myself. Why do these songs always seem to hit the nail right on the head, at the worst possible time? I was trying not to. I didn't have long to wait.At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg.Stuggling to. More

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